(17/4/24, 5.22 am): [UPDATE 23/4/24, 9.38 am: WOW, LIKE MY OTHER NOTES, THIS ONE’S MADE A POSITIVE IMPACT ON SOCIETY. I HONESTLY WAS WORRIED IT’D SPARK OFF JEALOUSY OR SKEPTICISM. INSTEAD, ONE OF MY FAVOURITE YOUTUBERS STEPHANIE LANGE MADE A GREAT “SPIN-OFF” VIDEO ABOUT WHY SEEMINGLY UNATTRACTIVE PEOPLE HAVE HOT PARTNERS. I CAN TELL WHAT I SAID ABOUT ATTRACTION HELPED HER EXPLAIN THIS TOPIC. I THINK MY NOTES HELPED OTHERS TOO, TO FEEL BETTER ABOUT THEMSELVES.
IT’S TIME PEOPLE STOPPED PUTTING DOLLAR SIGNS ON PEOPLE’S HEADS, BASED ON HOW ATTRACTIVE THEY ARE. THERE’S SO MUCH MORE TO ATTRACTION THAN JUST LOOKS. EVEN MY RELATIONSHIP WITH A HOT EX SOON BECAME INTOLERABLE BC OF HIS SPOILT, CRAZY, DISRESPECTFUL BEHAVIOUR.
LIKE ANY JOB, LOOKS WILL ONLY GET YOU THROUGH THE DOOR. AFTER THAT, YOU NEED TO OFFER SO MUCH MORE TO MAINTAIN A HEALTHY, HAPPY RELATIONSHIP. NOT JUST THAT, HOT WOMEN DO GET CHEATED ON OR DEAL WITH DV, SO THEY EVENTUALLY GO FOR PARTNERS WHO AREN’T ALWAYS ATTRACTIVE, BUT WILL TREAT THEM BETTER.
IN 2019, MY STALKERS COMPLAINED ABOUT WHY BEAUTIFUL WOMEN DATE UGLY MEN. THEY WERE REFERRING TO MY WEALTHY EX & ME. IF YOU WATCHED US TALKING, YOU’D THINK WE WERE BEST FRIENDS. HE’S NEVER GIVEN ME ANY MONEY BC I’VE ALWAYS DECLINED. I WANTED HIM TO KNOW THAT THIS RELATIONSHIP WASN’T ABOUT MONEY & THAT’S ONE OF THE REASONS WHY HE LOVED ME.
ALTHOUGH HE TOOK ME TO 5-STAR HOTELS, RESTAURANTS & VACATIONS, I NEVER ASKED FOR ANY OF IT. THAT WAS JUST HIS LIFESTYLE. IF I DIDN’T LEAVE HIM, WE WOULD’VE BEEN HAPPILY MARRIED. OF COURSE I HAD MY REASONS, PLUS THERE’S NOTHING TO SAY WE WON’T REUNITE. JUST DEPENDS ON SOMETHING ELSE].
There’s this mysognist jerk who’s bragging that men get better with age & rightfully seek younger women as partners. Meanwhile, he thinks older women age like milk, they’re old & they’re done. I can’t remember his exact words but they’re even worse. The more I hear from him, the more I want 5 mins alone with the guy to straighten him up.
He’s spreading an ideal that’s damaging older women & is also counter-productive bc this ideal will soon work against him & he knows it. That’s why he’s making older men seem attractive, so that when it’s his turn, women will still find him ahem “attractive”. The man is incredibly selfish. He’s that insecure, he puts down older women for his own selfish purposes, just to feel more superior, just as young women do it too. Since when did older women become their go-to punching bag? They’re putting down their own mother? Can’t they talk about their own good qualities without needing to bring down someone or a group of people? And when they get older, did it ever occur to them that this self-destructive ideal will work against them? Perhaps the older women can give him a taste of his own medicine, now that I’m about to state his greatest fear. Or better yet, let me face him.
Outwardly, he acts overconfident, but I can see right through him. I know what his greatest fear is: HE’S AFRAID OF AGEING, SO HE PUTS THE SPOTLIGHT ON OLDER WOMEN, WHILE HE PROMOTES MEN AS BECOMING MORE ATTRACTIVE AS THEY GET OLDER BC HE KNOWS HE’S GETTING OLDER.
Man, I should’ve saved that for when I’m face-to-face with the douchebag & catch him off-guard in front of live recording. Then again, I’m actually camera-shy. More on that shortly. Anyway, what a pathetic excuse of a man. And he’s not even great-looking like he thinks he is.
Confidence & a bit of ego are fine as long as you do it in a more tasteful way & not at the expense of others. He’s not charismatic & he’s pissed off a lot of people. His ideals are working against him. People think he’s ugly too. He definitely has an ugly personality, which then makes him ugly, unappealing & boring. Is “Men age like fine wine & women age like milk” the only claim to fame these mysognists have? Why do we give idiots like him any attention or validation, which are what he’s looking for… & a punch in the face. He wants validation that he’s hot but it’s drawing in the opposite. I suppose for people like him, any attention is good attention bc I doubt he’ll ever get the validation he’s looking for.
Part of the reason why I’m camera-shy, is bc I need to get my teeth fixed. I look alot older bc it’s missing & there’s nothing to fill up that spot, so it not only makes me look older, it makes me seem like I’m unhappy or frowning bc of the excess skin. Once I get them fixed, I’ll hopefully feel more confident to take photos. Even I can’t escape our society’s ideals on beauty. It’s immersed in everyone’s thoughts. But apart from that, I’m camera-shy anyway. During the investigation, the suspects, especially the jealous women but also disgruntled, immature, racist men, took joy in attacking my weight, which fluctuated bc of their mistreatment. Regardless of whether their insults are accurate or not, of course it impacted my self-esteem & I became less confident with my appearance.
Bullying should’ve been taken more seriously in school. Bc they’re not disciplined & punished when they’re younger, these bullies become dangerous to society later on. You saw how unhinged the stalkers were. There was literary nothing they weren’t willing to do to harm their victims.
This is bc throughout their lives, they were conditioned to believe that nothing happens when they do bad things to people. Nowadays, even their own departments don’t do jack when they harm others. On top of that, they had a very corrupt chairman encouraging that kind of behaviour! Do they seriously think, “We Caucasians don’t listen to Asians” will hold up in court? I acknowledge that racism played a role in the scandal but there was even more to it. Jealousy & an infatuation with me or my ex played an even bigger role. But yes, some will likely face charges for hate crimes. Thanks for volunteering that info twice, CP. So unless these people are made an example of, they’ll continue this reign of terror until someone like me gives them a taste of their own medicine. Well actually, I forced them to drink a whole bottle of medicine.
Being camera-shy also means I don’t take many selfies. There may seem like a decent amount of selfies I took, until you realise many are taken on the same day. Thus, the number of incidents of me taking selfies is actually far less than you realise. I probably take selfies less than 3 times a year. Pretty shocking, considering my stage personality is more flamboyant, confident & seemingly taking pride in my looks. It’s alot to do with my past bc I was on drugs for 20 yrs. It’s not a fake image, maybe a caricature of my personality, although I rarely if ever talk out loud about my appearance. That one’s more for show or for comical reasons. My stage & my real personality are more to do with my mood.
As an addict, I avoided looking at myself in the mirror unless I needed to. I was ashamed of who I became & didn’t want to see my own reflection. But even after yrs of being mostly clean, I still don’t take selfies, partly out of habit. Maybe this’ll change when I fix my teeth. Even my lips have thinned bc of the missing teeth. I often wonder how influencers can afford to get veneers, plastic surgery & botoxes so often, like money grows on trees.
I’ve been brought up with manners & taught to be respectful towards others. I’m not perfect, but that’s what I strive to do. Bc of the kind of company I’ve been around (including a disrespectful, racist investigator), I admit I can be a bit rough around the edges. It’s hard to stay polite when someone keeps disrespecting you. There’s only so much I can tolerate. Despite everything, I still address my enemies as “gentlemen”.
I tend to say “thank-you” & “please” a lot, but is it too much? I don’t know. Someone (I think he was a Hollywood director) told me not to be so polite & encouraged me to be more demanding or assertive, which of course works well for him bc he’s the bigshot. I can see exactly what he means though bc I do it too, when I’m calling the shots in the investigation for example. It works well for situations where you want to establish your authority. Sagittarians are known for it.
In general for me though, as an ordinary citizen, I found that manners are mostly a positive thing & it works to my advantage, big or small. Roughly 11 years ago, I even managed to talk my way out of being robbed by a gang once, just by being respectful towards the leader. After talking for 5-15 mins, he told them, “Don’t touch her. Leave her alone. Let’s go”.
Dunno if you call it old-school values or just being a decent human being, but there are codes you abide by, if you want to be perceived as charismatic, respectable & admirable. Apart from the formidable Hitler, I can’t think of any bigot who was ever considered charismatic, admired or respectable by the general public.
Hitler himself wasn’t a popular, beloved figure either. His own people came to hate him too after WW2 ended. He virtually abandoned them & left them to deal with the mess he made. But like many others, I can’t help but admire his impressive qualities, though I strongly condemn his racist ideals & war crimes. It’s a shame he could’ve been admired & beloved by the world if he never was racist. It’s also 2-faced to be ruthless towards one group for no reason & continue being a respectable man around others.
Having manners also works for dating too. It makes you appear well-educated, intelligent & you’ve got your poop together. I didn’t gain admirers from just my looks alone. In fact, I don’t fit the beauty standards. Maybe my face did/does, esp. in my prime, but I’m only 5 ft tall. Yet it’s never prevented me from getting dates. Half of my exes were over 6 ft, so they didn’t care & I don’t expect them to be over 6 ft either. You’ll miss out on the shorter, but good-looking ones! I had one in mind!
I tend to go for men I find sexually attractive. If they’re not, the relationship won’t last but I’m less picky these days bc as I get older, the men are too. You can’t expect them to be hot with a 6-pack at say 50 yrs old. Try doing that & let’s see how many you find. Plus sexual attraction isn’t just about looks. He might be charismatic, respectful towards me, is respectable, or is financial stable or powerful, which can make him attractive to me too. It just depends what turns you on. Your priorities in a man also changes as you get older. Same for him. According to some younger single men, they may not want single mothers, but older men & other younger men don’t mind, or they have them too.
I used to be superficial, but now I’m more attracted to men who are financially stable, will treat me with respect & integrity & is intelligent, kind & not abusive or violent himself. All these traits I yearned for bc my ex severely lacked them. When the terrible memories came flooding back, I realised I left him for very good reasons. He wasn’t just abusive, he was a total loser in every aspect. There was nothing to like about him except his looks. Not personality, respectfulness, finances, nothing. He wasn’t hubby material. I refuse to get back with him. He didn’t have his poop together & was relying on me to be the financial supporter. When that cop got me kicked out, he hurled an array of abuse, calling me “useless”. What self-entitlement. No, he doesn’t deserve me. He’s a totally useless man himself. I can make something of myself, he won’t. He never improved in 9 yrs & he’ll be a burden on me. No one can possibly hold it against me. But it doesn’t mean I’ve stopped caring for him after 9 yrs together. It just means his luck had run out yrs ago & there are no 2nd chances left.
What turns me into potential wife material (or even trophy wife), are things like education, intelligence, manners, values, integrity, personality & how I dress. Most men say they don’t like makeup, so that’s not important. It’s more important to women it seems! Don’t get me wrong, men like minimal makeup too bc it accentuates your natural features. But I heard they don’t like heavy makeup, including heavy eyeshadow & foundation.
Believe it or not, men incl. hot men value educated or intelligent women, especially when it comes to wife material. I think it’s bc if you’re willing to dedicate your time to a course or subject, then you’re willing to dedicate your efforts & time into the relationship. Also, if they think logically, they’ll behave more rationally thus are less problematic. Furthermore, education has long been associated with manners, morals & critical thinking. Tip: if a man doesn’t value intelligence or education, be a bit wary. He might be just after sex not a long-term relationship, or he doesn’t take you seriously. I hope these tips apply to you, but I can only provide tips that work for me, that I know of, or are based on a pattern of male behaviour in my life. I’m not a relationship expert. Furthermore, the dating game isn’t linear. It depends on personal tastes, whether they’re looking for a relationship & whether they’re attracted to you in the first place etc. Just bc it works for me, doesn’t mean it’ll work for everyone else. I was blessed with the advantage of being attractive too, so I offer no guarantees. But there’s no harm in reading my note. They’re just tips, not a substitute for expert advice. I wish everyone luck & I hope they find the one, based on at least one advice I’ve provided. If it helps you, I’m happy for you.
Another thing men find appealing is that I’m respectful, kind & patient towards others, except to my enemies which I think is understandable, considering the way they treat people. That kind of behaviour doesn’t switch on arbitrarily for just one stranger. This is them most of the day. The rest is dedicated to hiding who they really are from their peers.
Turns out there are many more victims suffering in silence, just as I suspected. I’m just the one who had the balls to oppose them. I knew that I could beat them at their own game & I wanted this web of lies to be permanently destroyed to prevent there being more victims.
As I’m getting older, I still have admirers. Manners & looks aren’t the only factors in scoring someone you like. I still have men who are shy around me & I find it amusing & cute. Now I’m starting to like this guy bc of how he treats me & I can tell he really likes me too. The occasional slip of the tongue & you get an insight into how he feels about you. Sometimes he says stuff like “I went to X place – but only with my sibling! No one else!” as though to say, “It’s ok, I’m not cheating on you!” I just found it very funny bc we’re not even together. But by saying that, he indicated that he’s not going to cheat on me, which is always points in my eyes. No one likes a cheater.
The Alpha guys (the definition’s radically changed these days!) put down the Beta guys just to seem more superior (what’s with the bullying of groups?), but I see right through their bullshit. They’re violent, childish, superficial, arrogant, ill-informed about how to treat women. I’m seriously not impressed with their mysognistic mantras on the internet. Good luck with the women! You’ll need it. I’ll be dating the Beta guys thanks. That’s a smarter move if you don’t want chaos in your life. But sometimes the quiet ones can be deadly like my ex, so treat everyone on an individual basis. If this is what alphas are like these days, no thanks. The macho, tough, overconfident ones tend to be either selfish, abusive or cheaters. My dad’s an alpha & he excels in all 3. I may be a female alpha, but we’re nothing like alpha males. In fact, the original alpha males were admirable & similar to their female counterparts. What’s happened to that kind of alpha male? It’s like some narcissist who overrated himself woke up & decided to make up his own rules & ideals that he believed were alpha. And now we have all these childish, self-centred idiots thinking that this is the correct way to be an alpha male. What a bunch of delulus!
So those who are looksmaxxing may benefit in the short term, but if they have a shitty personality, they won’t benefit in the long term. My ex is a perfect example of a good-looking man who no woman can tolerate for even 1 week bc of his abusive nature & spoilt personality. He may get the women from his looks alone, but they won’t stay long-term. I was the only one who had the patience for him. But he kept abusing it, until I never came back. Now he realises what he lost & he’ll never find someone who’s as kind, patient & will love him unconditionally ever again. All he can do is grieve over his loss. He had everything he ever wanted in a girl & he blew it. I almost feel sorry for him. Almost.
One thing I’ve been taught to do that always wins you points in life, is to respect your elders. I think older people have been overlooked, especially ever since the internet age, which is mostly dominated by the youths. In Asian cultures, it’s expected to respect your elder. The older groups don’t worry about being invisible or treated like garbage as it is in the Western world. In fact, they automatically get more respect & recognition, just for being older. Even if you’re only 2 yrs older than say, your colleague, that colleague must treat you with more respect & to reinforce that, there are certain words that you use when addressing someone older & vice-versa. It immediately establishes who the older person is & who gets to be treated with a bit more respect. That’s not to say that people won’t say something that offends you if you’re older, but it tends to be said in a more respectful or tasteful way. To make my point, the number of incidents involving disrespect towards your elders in Asian cultures, is significantly less than in the Western world. I’m hoping one day, the Westerners can learn something from the best of Asian cultures, just as we do the same with theirs. We learn the best from each other bc it generally stems from respect & admiration, rather than for plagiaristic reasons, which is frowned upon & considered disrespectful & unoriginal.
Western women can only dream of having the same thing as the Asian culture. that’s why more than ever, women (& perhaps even men) are terrified of growing older. I doubt it’s bc they’re worried as much about wrinkles, as it is about being mistreated & ignored/neglected by society. And it’s bc of the ideals of some of the most ignorant, offensive, unintelligent idiots who are spreading ideals that are either a bad influence, or it can result in long-term damage to others. While the LGBQT community & even races are getting better protection, I don’t understand why age discrimination isn’t also shut down. As you can see, it is damaging. Women are more than ever obsessed with youth & doing whatever they can to stop the ageing process, which is basically impossible. Even overuse of Botox is actually making people look older not younger. Ever since the age of the internet, we’ve had to watch, listen to & tolerate ideals that can be quite damaging, illogical & counter-productive. Discrimination & disrespect towards older people is at an all-time high & for some reason, it’s not censored & is considered normal or acceptable. But I can see how damaging it is to the older generation. They shouldn’t have to feel ashamed or embarrassed just for being older. You’d be surprised who it offends. I had an appt with a very handsome dental specialist. He looked like a movie star. I was 24 & I asked him how old he was. He said something to which I responded, “But 30’s not o-” I didn’t finish BC he quickly raised up his finger to say, “Don’t even think about saying I’m old!” I quickly shut up so he wouldn’t be offended & changed the subject. He was only 30, but already touchy about getting older! The more good-looking someone is, the more they’re afraid of getting older & losing their looks. I admit I can relate to it. I’m sure we all can.
LEGENDS ARE MADE OF THIS 
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